Reflections on day one of Choreography with Jess

So up until now I have just had my head stuck in the books researching. So yesterday was the first time I went in the studio to get this project on its feet. I decided not to plan anything for the day, I took in the Breathe Me script just so we could put everything in context, the music, my laptop and my kneepads... My reason for not planning was because I wanted this choreography to be a representation of a panic attach, so I wanted as little thought and emotional connection as possible, the choreography needed to be purely about the aesthetic, ie it needed to look like a panic attack and what I feel when I dance it needs to be minimal.

We worked from 11 till 4 and got a lot done! Working with Jess was great, I love the way she moves anyway and her style of dance. It did feel quite alien to me at first but the more I did a movement I was able to find my way into it and really make it my own. I felt we were able to work really well together creating and choreographing the two pieces I needed. There was no special method really, we looked at the context, listened to the music and pieced some movement together that looked good (and felt good) and that was that!

I really love what we did and right now I’m finding it really hard to imagine having to do this all again next week with Sarah and how it is going to be different/better/more connected. The problem is that I do feel connected to the movement, I think because of my training; which has been about finding a true connection to movement and really speaking through the body and the fact that I feel connected to the character I’m portraying because of my own issues with anxiety and panic attacks.

So how can I feel less connected, do I need to? I have a lot of doubts and worries about how I can make these two pieces different, and if what we created yesterday was a true representation. Did we go far enough? Was it dancy enough? Questions questions question! But I don’t think I will really know any of the answers until I get back in the studio next week with Sarah to create the second lot of choreography.  So between now and then I need to hit the books again and come up with a solid plan for next Saturday, which I think I am going to base on techniques used by Bausch and other post-modern choreographers to draw movement from her dancers that they are emotionally connected to.